Starting therapy is a big step and the timeline for reaching that decision looks different for everyone—whether it takes years, months, or just a few days. Several factors influence this decision such as your readiness for change, the perception you have about psychotherapy, finding a therapist who speaks your language or is in your area, and financial considerations.
Once you’ve made that decision, the most natural question is „What will happen during the first session?“
In my experience, people often come to therapy with a variety of expectations such as:
To experience quick relief from a current situation
To change something about their behavior
To get advice or solutions for a difficult decision
To be „fixed“ by the therapist
To receive tools, skills, and learn new coping mechanisms
To heal old wounds
To fix a relationship
Or even out of curiosity, to see what psychotherapy can offer them.
As reasonable and understandable as some of these expectations are, a first meeting is usually not enough to meet them entirely.
What can one realistically expect in the first therapy session?
The first session is primarily an opportunity to see if there is an affinity and connection with the therapist—or if there is potential to create one. While it is the therapist's role to create a warm, safe, and trusting environment to allow the client to open up, this doesn’t always guarantee a connection right away—and that’s okay. Finding the right therapist is important, and I always encourage clients to be honest about how they feel.
The session is about getting to know you. I’ll ask questions about your degree of satisfaction in different areas of life, such as health, relationships, and work, as well as important life transitions and stressors from the past 1–2 years. This gives me an overview that helps me place your concerns in context.
It’s also the right time to talk about your goals and expectations. Often, clients have several goals. In these cases, I help them prioritize so we can focus on the most pressing issue first while keeping the bigger picture in mind.
During the session, I’ll explain how psychotherapy works best and emphasize that it’s a collaborative process. The goal is to provide support and knowledge while helping you strengthen your autonomy and facilitate your access to your resources.
Lastly, we’ll cover practical matters like session frequency, costs, confidentiality, and next steps. I also make time for feedback and any questions you may have.
What you should Not expect in a first session?
Instant solutions or deep insights. Many of my clients report feeling some relief and having more insight after the first meeting, simply from talking to an objective, non-judgmental listener. However, it’s unlikely that anyone will walk away with all the answers after one session. Real change and deep insight take time. Just as problems weren’t built in a day, they can’t be resolved in an hour.
To talk about everything. Since it's our first meeting, part of my role is to guide the conversation to focus on what's most important. While I listen carefully and empathetically, I aim to get a sense of the core issue that brought you to therapy, without overwhelming the session with too many details at once.
Heavy emotional work: Expecting to dive into deep emotional work right away is unrealistic. The first session is more about getting comfortable and building trust. Once a rapport is established, we can explore deeper emotions at a pace that feels right for you.
A quick fix in one session: There is no one-size-fits-all in therapy. While people may share the same diagnosis—whether it’s depression, anxiety, PTSD, or something else—the history behind those symptoms and the ways to address them vary from person to person. My approach is to co-create a customized and structured plan with you, allowing the process to unfold naturally, based on your readiness for change.
The first therapy session is a crucial step in your journey, but it’s just the beginning. While it’s natural to have expectations, I’ve seen from experience that lasting change takes time. By taking this step, you’re investing in yourself—and that’s something to be proud of.
If you are thinking about starting therapy and you have questions I did not address, please feel free to reach out! I’d be happy to answer your questions.
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